What Are You Complaining About?

Have you noticed how much people complain? We complain about unfairness at our jobs ~ someone is getting a promotion and it isn’t you. We complain about problems with a family member ~ your brother won’t get a job, your sister won’t talk to you because you criticized how she raises her teenage daughter… Everyone has an example to share. Whatever your complaints, it is probably something that you have been complaining about for a long time.

Your impulse when you are caught in this loop of complaint, frustration and anger is to keep complaining.

The danger is that once unleashed, complaints take on a life of their own. You start to believe you have no options and feel stuck. The more you complain, the more powerless you feel and you learn to tolerate the intolerable.

In fact, you end up tolerating situations that you can change…if you simply shift your point of view.

The More You Complain, The More You Are Tolerating

For example, a former client saw a co-worker get juicy assignments that stretched his skills to the point where he applied for and got a promotion, while she waited her turn. She stopped tolerating being overlooked and started asking for what she wanted. Another client struggled with feeling guilty and responsible for the poor financial decisions her grown children made. She would always bail them out. At the same time, she had huge debt herself that she wasn’t handling. She had to stop being everyone’s bank in order to clear up her debt and start saving for her retirement.

The signals that you are tolerating something:

  • You believe you don’t have a choice.
  • You are more comfortable with your pain than with change.
  • You feel powerless to have what you want and need in your life.
  • You complain to anyone who will listen.

Change is not always easy. Taking the first step to having more time, money, energy, fun, love and joy can feel difficult, despite the amazing results that are available to you.

One way to embark on this journey is to begin with a question.

Will you answer this question: What are you tolerating in your life? Please answer honestly.

 

 

 

 

Like, Share, Love