Have you heard the term Slippery Slope? It refers to a course of action that is difficult to stop and will lead to some kind of trouble or disaster. Once you’re on it, it’s hard to climb back up to solid ground.
Sometimes we’re on a path, and we’re not paying attention to where we’re going. Things are so good at the beginning, and we’re happy—that we found the right job or met somebody interesting. Not only are we happy; we’re also optimistic, seeing only the best in the situation or the person, and relaxing into this new set of circumstances.
Beginnings are honeymoon periods. We’re not paying attention to the small things that don’t match our hopefulness and positive expectations.
Sometimes, however, if something is not a good fit for you, you will sense worry in your gut but you ignore it. Or you have a troubling thought that you brush aside. You know what I’m talking about.
Things are good until they aren’t. All of a sudden, you don’t know what happened, and you don’t understand why things aren’t working the way you hoped. In actuality, the change is not that sudden: most things, good and bad, happen incrementally, and then we notice it.
As difficult as the climb back up to level land may seem, it’s imperative that you do it. And once you have landed where you need to be, you need to push the reset button. In the case study below, Caitlin needs to speak up for herself if she wants to escape her slippery slope.
Caitlin’s Side Gig Lands Her On A Slippery Slope
Professionally, Caitlin has built a career in content strategy and branding. She creates marketing and branding materials to get a company’s message out in compelling and consistent ways. The company she worked for was sold a few months ago, and along with many other employees, she lost her job.
Recently, Caitlin accepted a part-time job copyediting a colleague’s article for an industry publication. For Caitlin, copyediting is a fun, side gig. She does it because she enjoys it. And she’s good at it. Her colleague works in a small company where people collaborate frequently, and her temporary co-workers took notice of her work, which they appreciated and praised.
Once the information got out that Caitlin had industry experience in branding and marketing, other members of the company asked her to assist them with their projects. And that’s how Caitlin started down the slippery slope—doing higher-level work with inadequate compensation. She said yes to these assignments. But—oops!—she never renegotiated her pay.
A Big Oops!
As a content strategist, Caitlin tells a company’s story, drives potential clients to the website, increases website traffic, and improves sales. You’re a creator and creative in what you write, the images you use, and the technology you implement to get there. Assignments like these were the bread and butter of Caitlin’s career.
To her credit, Caitlin is aware that her new projects should pay more than copyediting. She’s feeling the pain of being undervalued and underpaid. But she doesn’t know where to start to get off this slippery slope.
In Caitlin’s words, there was never an appropriate time to talk about being underpaid for her current work. She believes she is now locked into the previous money arrangement. When we spoke, she was still processing how she had landed in this uncomfortable situation.
Roadblocks to Asking for What You’re Worth
Caitlin is facing several barriers that keep her from asking for more money. These roadblocks are familiar to many of us, so I think you’ll be able to identify with her frustration. The roadblocks include:
- Not knowing what you want.
- Thinking negative thoughts.
- Missing the right words.
Not knowing what you want
Initially, Catlin was interested in staying busy, earning some extra money, and taking time to think about what she wants in her next job. Now, she’s gotten caught up in this company’s projects and timelines. She’s accepting whatever work comes her way because she lost sight of her reason for taking a small, transitional gig.
Thinking negative thoughts
Whether you call it attitudes, assumptions, beliefs, or mindset, it’s the story running you at this moment. Caitlin could not think herself out of this dilemma because her thoughts reinforced her belief that she couldn’t change the situation. Here’s a sampling of Caitlin’s negative self-talk:
“I wasn’t paying attention. I just sort of slipped into doing more work and higher-level work. So it’s my fault because I just let it happen.”
“I can’t change my mind … I’m stuck with the original deal.”
“I’m a fraud; I’m an impostor. If I charge what I believe my work is worth, they will discover I’m a fraud sooner rather than later. Let’s just leave things as they are!”
Missing the right words
What started as a short, part-time gig turned into a nearly full-time job. And while Caitlin is aware that her compensation is way too low for the current projects, she’s baffled by how to bring up the subject. She wants to talk with the colleague who hired her to edit his articles, but she’s not sure how to start the conversation. She needs to speak up for herself and ask for fair compensation without losing her composure, and without letting self-doubt sabotage her.
Getting Off the Slippery Slope
(Because this is a blog post, these suggestions are abbreviated. You can find detailed, in-depth help and strategies in my book.)
- Know what you want. Think about your goals, needs, and intentions and write them on a piece of paper. Use your written statement to choose what you say yes to. Initially, Caitlin was interested in a short-term project working with one person who let her set her own schedule. She lost sight of her original intention.
- Know your worth. Caitlin felt unprepared to talk about the value she provides to the company. She had accepted the disparity between the new assignments and her compensation in part because she had never addressed her lack of confidence in her talents and abilities. She had never done what I call a “Worth Inventory” where you pinpoint the value you bring to other people. Don’t wait to find yourself on a slippery slope, wondering what kind of money you should ask for. Take your worth inventory now!
- Put all your agreements in writing. Include all the details. Even a handwritten or emailed understanding can stop you from undermining yourself. Caitlin could have sent her colleague an email naming and the describing the copyediting project, the compensation for it, and possibly including a time frame. It’s a simple step to put agreements in writing. A written agreement would give Caitlin a stepping-off place to start a conversation about her future compensation for new projects. In this example, the written agreement would be a prop, a very useful one—because it would describe the limits of the work she was hired to do for a specific pay scale.
- Decide what you want to say and practice it. Caitlin and I did this together—we wrote a script for her in her own words. There are many ways to “say it,” but the best way is using words and phrases that are natural for you. Then, practice your script with a friend, colleague, coach, or in the mirror.
Have you ever been in a similar situation? Where all of a sudden, you look around and say to yourself, how did I land here? It could be a situation at work, like Caitlin’s. Or it could be at home or with friends, where you’ve dismissed your need for boundaries, and now you are overwhelmed and missing out on your time alone. We all have stories like this. What’s yours? Please share your experiences—you will be helping other women learn from your mistakes. Much of what I write about is based on mistakes that I’ve made! (And what I have learned from these mistakes.)
Are you interested in looking at the value you bring to your work, family, and community? Request a complimentary conversation with me using my contact form to start your Worth Inventory today. Or, send me an email with Worth Inventory in the subject line. I look forward to helping you know your worth.
